


Conversations with God

by AngelynMoon



Series: Deal [14]
Category: Lucifer (TV), Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Acceptance, Baby Alec Lightwood, Bad Parent Maryse Lightwood, Child Neglect, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Other, Probably should tag Blasphemy now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-07-28 12:10:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20063812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelynMoon/pseuds/AngelynMoon
Summary: Summary: Alec has had many conversations with his Grandfather, though he does not always recognize him as such.Or in which God cannot breach the rift between Lucifer and himself and so takes to keeping a close watch on the son of his son instead.





	1. Chapter 1

The first time Alec meets God he has no clue who the man is, not to him, not to the world.

The first time Alec meets God he is only hours old, unaware of the man who stands next to him, unaware of the tubes and runes that already mare his new skin, unaware that he is dying, that the very Grace that created him is tearing his mortal body apart and ripping it asunder.

Left alone Alexander, Son of Lucifer will be dead within hours, will not even see a full day of life.

God looks at the little baby, watches the little chest move laboriously up and down as he listens to those undeveloped lungs struggle to do their job.

God knows that with proper help, that the mundanes as they are called, can help this child live and while the boy would never hunt as he was expected to he'd survive, but God also knows about Raziel's favored, he knows that they would never allow the mundanes to aide this boy, knows that even if they did the boy's mother would rather see the child to a grave before letting mundane medicine save him.

God looks at the baby, thinks upon his own children, they were never so young as this, not like this anyway, he and his Wife had made them grown and fully formed, they had never relied on them as this child relied upon his parents.

God reached out to the child as the child's lungs began to fail, lifted him up into his arms and tucked him close to his warmth as he guided the child's own Grace to fix the failing organs that the child had before reaching into the child and tucking the Grace down and away, out of reach.

Of course God knew that the Angelic Rune the child would one day receive would awaken the Grace but for now the Grace would do little harm over all.

When all of this was done God pauses, baby held in his arms, slowly waking. 

Little Alexander blinks up at him and God let's out a quiet breath as Lucifer's eyes stare up at him, as innocent as Lucifer never was. The child reaches out without coordination and God takes that tiny hand in his as he whispers a tale, a story of creation to this new little life.

God knows that the child will not remember this, knows that he will only recall the warmth of his arms and the calm of his touch and for now that is enough.

As God wraps a blanket made of Grace and feathers around the now healthy baby he presses a small kiss to the child's forehead along with a blessing.

It is a pitiful offering to the child as he lays him down in his little plastic bed, it is the very least God can give the child at this time, little Alexander deserves so much more from him, does not deserve what awaits him before Lucifer is ready to discover his existence but it is all he can do.

"One day, Alexander Morningstar, Son of my Son, my Lucifer, you will know love, and it will be yours for eternity as yours will belong to them. One day you will know the joy of another and the moment when two lives become one. I am sorry for the suffering that awaits you before then, but I can promise you will be happy one day, you need only wait for it and fight for it. I know you will. Peaceful dreams, Son of my Son." God whispered to the small baby as he sent him off to sleep, dreams of glitter and wisps of blue dancing in his mind.

Little Alexander would have these dreams for years, never knowing their origin, never knowing that they were a precious gift from his Grandfather, a glimpse of the man he'd one day love and cherish and go to Edom for.

But that was then, now little Alexander settled under the soothing touch of God and as a nurse came back to check on the newborn God vanished, leaving the baby behind sleeping easily and peacefully.

And the nurse only frowned at the change of health before thanking the Angel for allowing the Runes to heal the boy's ills, unknowing as she thanked the wrong Divine being.

\---

A/n: Shit my hand slipped.

I intend for there to be more chapters in this. 

I couldn't help myself. I decided that not all of Alec's encounters with God should be him hitting the Divine being. 

I think however a lot of the meetings with young Alec will have him unaware of just who the other is.

This will span the whole of the Deal verse, likely not chronologically, but i will try to put an age for Alec in the stories so you can slot it into place on a timeline.

Sorry about the slight angst about dying Alec, but i did mention at one point Alec's Grace was killing him, it seemed fitting to have God fix it.

God may not answer Lucifer but he looks out for Lucifer's son. And yes God does glamour Alec's eyes before Lucifer does, God's power doesn't work well in Hell and when Alec wakes that first night after Luci takes him away from Maryse his little red eyes are showing and Lucifer hides them for the boy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec is saved by God.

God knows his voice, has tuned in to it since the first time the boy spoke his first word. 

So when he feels the ritual of prayer come from this particular child he cannot resist going to him, because it is not the Angel that the boy calls out to as all his fellows do, it is God himself that he cries out for.

Little Alexander Morningstar sits, tiny hands coated in red and demons bearing down on him. The boy can't be older than three as he cries out for help he has no way of knowing will come.

The men who had taken the boy are dead, killed by the demons they summoned and the demons writhe as they fight over who gets the Grace filled child as well.

God does not allow their argument to finish, with a snap of his finger the demons burst into Ichor and Alexander falls silent.

God approaches the blood covered child and lifts him carefully, finding only that he needed to re-tuck the child's Grace away.

"Hi." The tiny boy says shyly and God smiles as he carries the child from the bodies, they will soon be found by the Nephilim, as they call themselves but the only one that can truly claim the title is sitting in his arms.

"Hello, Son of my Son." God returns as he makes the blood leave the child and settles a small coat of Grace and Angel feathers on the child's shoulders to shield him from the cold they step into.

"Are you a Warlock?" The boy asks, "Can they all do magic like that?"

God can't help but smile, the boy has no clue what awaits him, why he is so excited to see magic done and God finds himself wishing that he would be present for that first meeting though he knows that he cannot be there, not for that.

God shakes his head, "I am no demonspawn, Son of my Son. I suppose you can call me a being of Divinity."

"Like an Angel?" Alexander asks with his eyes wide open and only God can see the red they truly are behind the hazel he used to hide them.

God merely smiles and neither agrees or disagrees for it will not due to have Alexander to know what he is just yet, let the boy make his own conclusions.

There is silence for sometime as God walks and there are several moments when he thinks the child has gone to sleep at least until he speaks again.

"Can we get hot cocoa, Mister Angel?" Alexander asks softly, as though expecting to be refused.

The child has no way of knowing that God, in this moment, will refuse him nothing, for he knows too what awaits the child's return to his mother.

They have hot cocoa, God takes them to a tiny shop in Paris, though Alexander will never know that, only recall the familiar taste when several years later his chosen mate brings him the treat after a long day.

And he'll tell them about the taste he remembers, the kind man that saved him from Nephilim that were going to use him as some kind of sacrifice, why Alec does not know, and he'll laugh when he says 'I thought him a Warlock at first, then an Angel, but I suppose he must have been neither.' They never speak of it again and Alec never thinks of it but sometimes his mate wonders after everything comes to light, he wonders just who it was that saved Alexander so long ago though he has yet to dare voice such a thought.

But that is then and this is now and right now God sits with the Son of his Son, Lucifer, drinking hot cocoa in the park, the child spilling his own in his eagerness to take in the treat that he has only ever had rarely when he is offered it by those they visit.

Eventually the little boy will be pulled away from God to play with another child and God will watch him until one of the Nephilim from his Institute finds him and takes him back to his mother. Then the boy will look over the other's shoulder to see God standing and the boy will wave and his eyes will widen when the man that saved him just vanishes without a trace or portal or a flash of wings, Alexander does not know what it means then, only tells his mother because she insists and who tells him that he should not make up such lies when he just wanted to go to the park.

She never believes that Alexander was taken, only thinks he ran away to play and Alexander only ever tells the truth of it once and never again for what is the point when none believe his word.

But he commits the taste of the hot cocoa to memory, the warmth and calm that he vaguely recalls from long ago, he tucks these things away, forgets them for a time and calls them forth when he needs some comfort that his mother does not offer.

And if Alexander does not pray to the Angel when things go bad, if he does not invoke the Angel in thanks and perhaps only calls out to God when things go wrong who can blame him when everytime he calls out such he finds himself with aide.

But right now little Alexander sits in God's lap, safe and secure, babbling a mile a minute about anything and everything he can think of, his baby sister, the training that God thinks he is much too young for, and his dreams of golden glitter with sparks of green and yellow kittie eyes, and wings of blue and God listens to this child as perhaps he wishes he had done such for his Son, the one this child belongs to.

\---

A/n: welp, second chapter, Alec is three. And some God cuddles. I don't even know and yeah Alec's dreams get more complex while still remaining abstract as he gets older.


	3. Chapter 3

God hears little Alexander babbling through the prayers of the Universe and something about it makes him listen as the boy tries sound after sound, stringing them together in some semblance of a word. It takes him a moment to realize what is about to happen, what is Alexander is about to do, it takes a moment more to realize that no one else will be there for it, that thus accomplishment of Alexander's will be the first of many he has alone.

And God decides that that will not do, that this is something someone should know, but he cannot yet tell Lucifer about the child, the Angel is not yet ready to be a father to him, his Demon not ready to be parent to the boy either, and God knows that Alexander's mother has no care to know that her son is about to speak for the first time.

So God goes to the boy and he smiles as the boy lifts himself in the playpen he has been left in for the past several hours.

"Up!" The little baby cries out, face red from the tears that went unheeded, the screams ignored by parent and fellow Nephilim alike.

God cannot help but answer the two year old's cries, lifting him against him, vanishing the full diaper and replacing it with one made from the softest material he has ever created, soothing the beginnings of a rash before it can truly discomfort the child.

God tucks the child to his chest and rubs his back, finding the voice of a young mother as she sings a prayer with her child as she rocks them, as a reward for her unknowingly sharing her voice he soothes the pain that keeps the child awake and screaming, the reason for such is beyond his ability to remove, he cannot, not for that child, if he does the child will never seek a cure for what ails him, will never find the cure for several other ills. It is unfortunate, God thinks, that some things must be for others to come to pass but it is so.

The child in his own arms quiets as the one in the mother's arms does and God extracts Alexander and himself from her as she begins to give her thanks instead.

Alexander whines hungrily and God wonders where his mother is but does not search for her, instead he calls Michael to him, surprising this Son with his presence, swearing the Angel to secrecy. He sends Michael to fetch the milk of a goat from a Temple made long ago high in the mountains where very few ever wander, this milk once sustained the life of a newly made Hunter of Demons, the first to take the name Nephilim and make it a protection rather than destruction and so it will be good enough for the hungry baby in his arms.

Michael returns quickly and they discover that neither of them know what to do, how exactly they can get the milk into the now wailing child.

It upsets Michael greatly that none come in response to the child's cries, concerns him and angers God in a way that he has not been in a very long time.

It takes some time before they make a decision and sneak their way into Hell, hiding their presence from Lucifer as they enter prison that holds the Wife of God.

She startles at their appearance, perhaps she might have done more but her gaze and attention fell immediately to the screaming child held in her Husband's arms.

The Goddess reached for the child, expecting to be rebuked, except that God handed the child over easily and watched his Wife take the offered milk and feed the small boy, tucking him close against her breast and humming softly as Alexander wrapped his strong fingers around her thumb.

"Where did he come from, Husband mine?" The Goddess questioned once the child was filled and drifting to sleep in her arms.

"He is the Son of Lucifer." God told her, ignoring Michael's gasp.

"Ah." The Goddess said and looked down at the sleepy baby, "He does have Lucifer's eyes, doesn't he?"

God nodded and reached out for the child, the Goddess reluctantly handing him over, knowing that this was the only meeting she'd ever have with him, knowing that she would never see him grown, that she'd be gone from this Universe before he brought the two halves of his family together as one.

It was unfortunate that she'd never be able to tell Lucifer how precious his child had been as a baby, but perhaps she should be grateful that she met the boy at all.

"He does." God paused and waved his hand to show her what else Alexander had received from his father, the white, downey wings flittering in that way little birds' do as the child slept and dreamed of blue mist and sparkles.

A moment later the wings were gone but the Goddess could not help but brush a lock of hair from the boy's forehead, could not help adding her own blessing to her Husband's, oh she understood that she could not tell the boy who he was meant for, understood that it was not her place to do so, but if she could help him along with a tug or two, make him drawn to the other, well, she looked at God as she made her blessing and he did not stop her.

Michael looked at his parents and extracted the child from between them.

"I will take him home, Father." Michael promised and left the two alone in his Mother's prison.

And if Michael perhaps dropped by every few hours with the milk of a goat from a Temple whose location was lost long ago to make sure the Son of his Brother was well fed and cared for well, that was between himself and God, who did the same.

It came as some surprise one day a few weeks later, when Maryse recalled that she did have a son that still needed her for sustenance, that her son would not take the milk from her breast, that he refused the bottled milk she attempted next. She did not understand and was angered that someone would go behind her back with this, conveniently forgetting that it had taken her weeks to remember that she had a son to care for.

But as luck would have it, or perhaps some sort of Divine intervention, Maryse Lightwood found herself pregnant with her husband's child and once again left Alexander to his own devices, never knowing that Alexander's care had not been taken up by a young female Nephilim, though that is what appeared on every camera, but instead by an Angel that missed his Brother enough to substitute him by caring for his nephew.

And well, Michael knew it could not be forever, knew that one day he'd have to explain to little Alexander that he had to go away but would not be able to tell the boy they'd meet again one day but he would take what he could, he would cherish each childhood memory that Maryse refused and keep it.

Maybe one day he would even offer to share them with Lucifer, but for now they were his, and Angels were rather possessive of what they claimed as their own.

\--

A/n: so... I have no excuse.

Michael appearing in Alec's childhood as a woman is tribute to the fact that some text do claim The Angel Michael to be female and well i couldn't resist having Michael deciding to make sure Alec was cared for, Lucifer was his favorite Brother before his fall, and perhaps if Michael is truthful even after.


	4. Chapter 4

Alec has long since learned to recognize the presence of his Grandfather, of God. He never tells his father, knows somehow that neither are ready to meet again.

So, when God appears in Magnus' loft he does not tell his father that the Divine being is there and God appears as he often does, an average looking mortal being, and yet somehow more in a way Alec has never really understood.

His hair might be black, but Alec knows it isn't, not really, it's like the deepest dark of the oceans, that place where no light lives, it's the night sky, the light of a thousand stars shining through it, it has always fascinated Alec when he was young, when he learned just who it was that had protected him for so long. 

God's eyes are similar, he chooses to have them appear blue, like Alec's do some days, but they are more a reflection of the sky above him, light blue when the weather is clear and stormy grey when clouds roll in, Alec's favorites had been when God came at dusk and Alec could see the sunset in his Grandfather's eyes.

But that is of little importance.

"Hey." Alec greets with a wave, he's alone because his wing is still healing from the Forsaken attack and everyone had something else to do.

Alec doesn't mind, he's been feeling a little claustrophobic with everyone around crowding him, even with Magnus and his Father.

"Alexander." God smiles at him and offers a hug that Alec allows because God has very kindly appeared in the living room and waited for him to come out of the kitchen instead of appearing behind him like usual, "I see you have injured your wings."

Alec flutters the blue glowing wings as he shrugs, "I'll be fine, do you want to have some breakfast?"

Alec knows that God does not need to eat, knows that he exists on the dew of the Universe or something but he also knows that sometimes God does enjoy the smallest of things, breakfast with Alec only one of them.

"Chocolate chip pancakes?" God asks voice excited at the thought and Alec smiles.

"I can do that." Alec grins as they move to the kitchen.

For all that Magnus has said Alec can't cook there are a few things that he can indeed create on the stove, pancakes he learned to make at the instruction of a being Alec now recognizes as his Uncle Michael, though at the time the Angel was a female, and though many of the attempts were charred and burned Alec had eventually been able to manage decent pancakes for the most part. Either way both Angel and God ate them like they were the greatest meal they'd ever had, because in fact to the Divine beings that sustained themselves not on the matter which the meal was made of but rather the manner by which the meal was made, meaning that they could not taste the burned edges of the pancakes or the raw batter in the center only the emotion that Alec made them with.

But eventually Alec did indeed manage to make decent pancakes, decent enough that even Magnus would eat them without flinching.

God stood with Alec as he cooked and they spoke of God's travels, the miracles he'd done and the ones that had been attributed to him.

And God listened as Alec told him of Magnus, about how they were engaged, which of course God knew but there was something about knowing and being told by Alec, of watching the way he relaxed just that little bit more, the way his red eyes danced like flame beneath the hazel that hid them and that shy little smile that had once been so rare under his mother's care, though perhaps even God could hardly call it that.

"Alexander!" A voice sang as the sound of a portal rang through the loft, "Are you cooking pancakes?"

Alec smiled and God matched it, it would be nice to meet the Warlock officially.

"Magnus." Alec grinned as they met at the doorway to the kitchen for a sweet, love-filled kiss.

"Darling." Magnus smiled back before noticing the other being, "Who is your friend?"

Alec glanced at God wide eyed.

God offered his hand out to the child of one of his Fallen Children, "I am Yahweh Angelos."

"It is nice to meet you, Yahweh." Magnus said as he shook God's hand.

God nodded and said, "I have looked forward to meeting you for a long while, Alexander speaks of you often."

Alec hid his face in his hands because he did talk about Magnus a lot but he had also thought that God wasn't listening that often.

Magnus pulled Alec's hands away with a soft smile, "Nothing to be embarrassed over, my love, I talk about you a lot too."

Alec smiled and then remembered the pancakes and rushed to save them.

What followed was a rather calm a lovely breakfast. 

Magnus found much to talk about with God and Alec could only watch, pleased that they got along, pleased that God seemingly approved of the one he'd chosen to love.

Of course Alec had no way of knowing that God had put Magnus in his path with the hope that they would come together, that the Goddess had tethered them in a way, but of course humanity had free will, the ability to choose, of course there was always the chance that Alec would have refused Magnus, that Magnus would have done the same.

But there had been one last little thing the Goddess had done, she had offered an old friend of Magnus' the chance to see him happy if he was willing to accept her proposal. And of course Ragnor Fell had agreed and had sent Magnus chasing after his happiness.

And perhaps there would be an odd little green toad hidden in an arrangement next to the officiant of a wedding between two Immortals, one born from the Grace of Heaven, the other born from the Fires of Hell, but which was which might be the question that few asked and few still knew the answer.

But for now they had breakfast, Magnus eating the matter by which the food was created and God feasting on the emotions behind the creation.

And perhaps it was days later the Magnus slowly turned to Alec as they sat reading on the couch and said in a voice that was more shock than calm, "Did we have breakfast with God?"

And Alec laughed as he nodded and Magnus tried to process the fact that God liked Alec's slightly burned chocolate chip pancakes enough to show up to breakfast.

But eventually Magnus would come to understand that the pancakes had little to do with God's delight at eating Alec's food, that Divine being had no reason to eat really, that their favorite foods had nothing to do with the taste of what was cooked, but the emotions that went into the preparation had everything to do with it.

Of course it would be several years in coming and several years of observing Lucifer and Alec's reactions to the children's attempts at cooking that helped the discovery.

And perhaps the fact that one day Jace revealed that Alec was to only person to not only survive Izzy's cooking but claim it was good before he discovered that it was inedible to mortals. Jace claimed he should have known then but really he was only fooling himself.

But Alec had loved eating Izzy's cooking, there had always been so much love poured into her attempts that even a single bite had filled his starving soul for a while, even after Lucifer came into his life. Izzy's cooking had kept him anchored in the ocean his mother kept him adrift in, an ocean of negative emotions all directed at him, and Angels don't do well surrounded by so much negativity. Izzy's attempts at feeding her brothers had helped save his life as much as Jace becoming his Parabatai had, she just wouldn't know it.

And yet we are still in fact having breakfast in the loft of Magnus and Alexander, accompanied by God and Pancakes. A meal filled with laughter and smiles like so many other.

\--- 

A/n: well, here you go, Magnus' first meeting with God.

Yahweh is another name for God and while Magnus is old enough to know that it takes him a bit because who expects God to show up on their doorstep, really?

And Angelos means Angels and while God is sometimes fantastically creative there are other time when he is just..not.


	5. Chapter 5

The first time young Alexander hits him the Nephilim is twelve and has just been reckless enough as to fly unprotected and unwatched.

God listens to Alexander often enough to know that the boy has only just begun to learn how to use his wings, knows that his flight feathers are not yet grown, knows that the boy only makes this short little flight through sheer stubbornness and willpower. 

Alexander is so like how Lucifer once was that sometimes God avoids hearing him, seeing him, knowing where he is in the Universe, it reminds him much too much of the Son who never prays to him anymore, who stopped expecting an answer long ago and so eventually stopped trying. Sometimes God considers the times Lucifer speaks into the vastness of the Universe to be a prayer, but in his heart he knows it is not. But God misses his Son and so even God makes believe that a lie is a truth.

God knows that Alexander should not be flying out here, should not even have his wings free without an Angel nearby, knows the Grace that lingers where the boy flies will attract his Fallen Uncles and their ilk, the boy has placed himself in danger by doing this and God, for once, cannot just permit the boy to be in danger.

It is, however, a mistake to appear behind the child without warning. The boy is alert, knowing what he is doing will get him in trouble and so when God appears on the Mortal plane the child is ready for him.

And God, God for once has been so focused on the present moment and not any future moments that it comes as a surprise when Alexander's small fist slams into his stomach and when he curls over in a rather Mortal response feels the child's other fist meeting the side of his face and God follows the momentum down, entire being in shock.

There is a moment of clarity, that tells him how right it is that this child is the only other creature in Heaven, Earth, and Hell to drop him so. That it is right that the boy stands over him in triumph, but that is only a tale added to the Bible for fun and perhaps Metatron knew of this moment and thought it funny to tell of his defeat by the Son of Lucifer, God supposes that Metatron cannot be blamed for the imaginings of Mortals.

"God?" Alexander asks, both worried and slightly embarrassed.

"Yes, Son of my Son." God said as he let the child help him to rise, "I have come to tell you of the danger you have put yourself in." 

And Alexander listens to God explain about the Grace trace that he has left behind, learns to see the Grace trace he has left behind as God willingly teaches him.

And if God stays for a time to let Alexander practice his flight, well, the boy needs supervision, protection and who better than God, himself?

And maybe God watches the boy wistfully, recalling another set of white wings spread in flight, forces the memory of white wings crumpled and broken and useless in a fall from his mind, forces himself to focus on the present rather than the unchangeable past, trying not to think about the unsteady future that waits for the owner of these yet unmatured wings.

God knows many things that are set in the future of many people, Mortal and otherwise, but Alexander is ever changing his future, he is Nephilim, both Mortal, thus under his hand to be guided, and Divine, thus beyond his control, perhaps that is why Nephilim were once so feared, perhaps it was because it was only Nephilim that truly had tbe freedom to choose, a guiding hand or go alone.

Alexander seemed content to allow both, and God thanked the Universe that he could not see what was to come for Alexander with any true surety, there was something pleasing about being surprised by the boy, something quite nice about being able to live in the moment.

God never understood the Mortal saying before and now as he watched the Son of his Son fly around above him he was glad to be caught in this moment.

\---  
A/n: acrayonsmile wanted to see Alec punch God so i wrote the first time he did so, plus his first flight.

The whole defeat of God by the child of Lucifer is a play on the whole end of the world thing, i thought it would be a little amusing if it wasn't something big and world ending but rather world changing. And Alec 'defeats' God by getting him on the ground when it is doubtful anything has ever managed such before.

This is definitely blasphemy now, sorry.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec comes out to God.

Alec's gay panic (deal verse)

Alexander is thirteen when God feels his fear like he never has before, there is an acidic taste to it and it smells like rot and dead men, it's a smell he never thought he'd ever link to Alexander.

It is the way all fear of him smells, the fear of God.

Little Alexander, who has discovered who he is only just after Lucifer came for him, should not fear him and not to this degree.

God goes to him, finds the boy on a high roof, covered in concealment Runes as though they could hide the boy from God.

The boy, like he often is, is tense, aware of his surroundings and when God appears behind him the boy whirls around, striking out at him. His hit glances God as the boy's balance is upset and God sees the boy fall, he sees him hit the ground and gasp and choke on the blood that fills punctured lungs...except...

God reaches out and pulls the boy to safety, tucks him into his arms even when the boy struggles, God just saw him die, he knows that it was only a possible future but God feels Human in this moment, he needs to cling to the Son of his Son for a moment, to sink himself into the possible future that wraps around Alexander now, God knows it will change, Alexander's future shifts and changes with each choice he makes but for now he watches the future that plays before his eyes.

When God releases him Alexander stumbles to the roofs edge, he looks over it and frowns at God.

"Why did you save me?" Alexander asks, confused and God does not understand.

"Why would I not?" God returns to him.

"Because of what I am." Alexander says simply and God thinks of all that Alexander is and can find no reason to wish his life ended.

"And what is it you think I would allow you death for?" God finally asks as he sits near Alexander on the roof's ledge.

Alexander sits close by, an arm's length away but God does not reach out to him, Alexander's fear against his tongue, in his nose, it burns and almost make tears well up in his eyes.

"I'm..." Alexander hesitates and God knows that this is important, that this moment changes just about every future that lays before Alexander.

God says nothing, he waits for Alexander, knows that he cannot rush him, that rushing him may just make him say nothing.

"I don't like girls." Alexander whispers like he hopes God does not hear him.

And for a moment God is confused, does not understand how Alexander could dislike an entire sex when he cares so much for his sister and then God looks at Alexander and understanding fills him.

Alexander is ashamed and afraid because he does not find girl attractive, God knows Raziel's people, hears them, their prayers, knows that there are many that look at their children when they see even the slightest hint that they may like their own sex and pray to Raziel to fix their children. Hears many prayers from Mundanes and Downworlder parents alike and God cannot fix what they find wrong with their children, will not.

Not when there is nothing to fix.

And God could play this lightly, Alexander will laugh but that would trivialize how brave Alexander was for speaking up, speaking to him about this fear he has.

So, God reaches out to the Son of his Son, pauses when he flinches and looks at him when Alexander dares to look at him.

"You are just the way you are meant to be, Alexander. If you like girls, if you don't, if you like boys, if you don't, if you like both, if you like neither, if you find yourself waiting to like a being, everything you are is just right and I love you anyway you are. You are brave to face your fears and I am proud that you did so, I am sorry that you feared me so much."

Alec looked at his Grandfather, the being that had created the Universe and whose words so many people interpreted so differently, who his own mother said hated homosexuals but was looking at his with bright eyes, arms open wide in welcome.and Alexander felt tears in his eyes as he threw himself into those arms feeling them close around him protectively.

God held him as he cried, smoothed his hair down gently and wrapped his soothing presence around Alexander, how he wished to do this for each young one that felt like Alexander, to comfort them and safeguard them, to reassure them that he held no hate for them, held no haye for any of his creations, not even the ones that deserved it, earned it. 

It was not God's place to hate, his place was to love and forgive all sins even though those sins must be punished God loved them still, as he loved the son he sent them to.

But God did not think about that focused on the boy in his arms as he felt Alexander's future shift once more and while he held the boy God watched the bright future that played out before him with a soft smile.

It was a beautiful future, one filled with acceptance and love and God had a feeling that with each choice Alexander made the future that unfolded for him and his family would only become even more lovely.

\---

A/n: Um... I guess this is just me projecting my feeling on how God should be rather than how people use him.

This is set after Alexander's first flight, the one that God watched not his first official flight, but before he comes out to Lucifer. I can't remember if I ever mentioned his age for his coming out to Lucifer. Let me know if I did and in what story so I can change it because i like the idea of Alec telling God that he is gay first.

Even with God's reassurances he's still afraid of telling his dad so.


	7. Chapter 7

Alexander is twenty-one the first time he prays without intending to be heard, the first time he wants not to be heard.

God, of course, always listens when Alexander begins to pray, expecting to be heard or no, God always listens to the Son of his Son.

What he does not expect to hear is Alexander talking about a boy, which no, God expects to hear more of Alexander waxing poetically about some fight Jace Wayland got into and God admits to himself that given the chance Alexander has quite the way with words. Had God been anyone else he might have fallen half in love with Jace just from the way Alexander spike of him.

Instead of hearing of Jace Wayland God hears Alexander speak another, a man, Demon's child with warm brown eyes and blue magic and dancing hands. 

And God finds himself amused because Alexander stutters and is at a loss for words in a way that he's never been before and God laughs to himself as Alexander questions his feeling because God knows what love is and listening to the beginning of Alexander's life long love affair brings him joy and fills him with warmth.

As the months pass and God listens as their story unfolds he can only feel joy for them except in the darkness of Alexander's prayers when Magnus Bane walks away from him.

God keeps an ear on Alexander the entire time before Magnus agrees to try again, whether Alexander prays or not, worried about what Alexander may do, or rather may not do.

The first time God meets Magnus Bane in person is a strange thing. God has only known him through Alexander's view of him and the man himself falls short ir perhaps Alexander has built him up so.

By the end of breakfast however Magnus has proved otherwise or perhaps God is only seeing him through how happy Magnus Bane makes Alexander.

And God supposes that that is what matters really, how happy Alexander is.

And Alexander Is Happy.


	8. Chapter 8

Chloe doesn't know who the man is, all she knows is that he has her daughter in his arms and she doesn't recognize him.

She has her gun out, pointing it at the man, shouting at him to put her daughter down and the man only smiles at her, refusing to put her daughter down.

So, Chloe shoots him, watches the bullet hit the man in the head, only he doesn't fall, doesn't die and her first thought is that a Demon has her daughter but Trixie shouts 'Grandpa' and Chloe pauses.

Chloe's father is dead, Dan's father she's met too often which only leaves Lucifer's father.

And that means that Chloe just shot God in the head.

"I am so sorry!" She cries as she puts her gun away, reaching to take Trixie.

God smiles at her, smiles even though she just shot him. Oh, dear, is she going to Hell because she shot God? Lucifer would probably laugh and give her a place of honor though.

"I understand, dy dear." God spoke softly but it seemed to echo in her ears, "I do not fault a mother's protection. My own Wife has done worse for our children."

Chloe wonders what could be worse than a bullet to the head but hugs Trixie close and does not think too hard on it, she probably doesn't want to know.

"What did you want?" Chloe asked instead.

"A Grandfather enjoys time with his Grandchildren, yes?" God asked looking at Trixie.

"I suppose. You just showed up to hang out with Trixie?" Chloe asked confused, "What about the rest of the world?"

"I am the air you breath, my dear, the water you drink, the food you eat. I am all and nothing. Just because I am here does not mean I am only here, child. I am Everywhere." God explained gently.

"Oh." Chloe said, "I guess I don't mind visits, but maybe no more surprise ones, I'd hate to shoot you again."

God laughed, "Little Alexander punches me near everytime I appear to him or I get an arrow in my chest. At the very least your bullet went straight through me, my dear." 

Chloe had to grin, God's joy was infectious, Alec did mention he'd punched God quite often, much to Lucifer's delight.

"Alright. Still I'd like warning or a message if you would." Chloe said, nit quite a demand.

God nodded, "Very well, my dear."

"I want to stay with Grandpa, mom, He promised to take me to see whales and turtles." Trixie said excitedly.

Chloe wondered if that meant they were going to an aquarium or the ocean and decided not to ask.

"Alright." Chloe agreed, who safer to keep her daughter than God himself?

"Yes!" Trixie shouted and grabbed God's hand and dragged him away.

Chloe watched, still a little stunned and called Alec, a little dazed and his laugh was calming and she found herself smiling as well.

God was nothing like she expected.

\--

A/n: God is true to his word and sends Chloe messages when he takes Trixie and Chloe realizes she should have been more specific in how she wanted those messages sent because doves with olive leaves in it's beak. Or the fact that dozens of different animals would stop before Chloe and just stare at her.

And honestly if God sent Trixie home with one more exotic animal for her to keep as a pet she was going to remove his visitation rights just see if she doesn't.

Alec laughs everytime she complains but he and Magnus have quite the menagerie of creatures from all over the world now. And Trixie has her own little personal portal to the menagerie room to feed her animals with Madzie and Max's help, sometimes Jace helps but he's terrified of both the snakes and spiders, Simon loves both.

And Chloe may or may not end up shooting God several more times and if, after Lucifer describes his Fall and how he was cast away from his family to reign in Hell, she feels less guilty about doing it and a bit more joyful about it, well, one day she will be the Queen of Hell and has just as much right to punish as her King.


End file.
